


Dwellingconfined

by UltimateProtagonistNerd



Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-10
Updated: 2014-12-10
Packaged: 2018-01-19 18:38:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1479922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UltimateProtagonistNerd/pseuds/UltimateProtagonistNerd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Four original children play a life-altering computer game that sends them on an adventure, will they be hurdled to their demise or create a new universe?</p><p>Several trolls play a game and discover a strange race called the humans, they are probably going to be killed they think.</p><p>"Yes, but so will they", the back of their minds replied.</p><p>Also carapacians and Cherubs get intertwined at some point and a tragicomedy of epic proportions unravels.<br/>(haha, my attempt at a description for the story that is my showcase of Homestuck OCs)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Act 1: Title Pending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first chapter, basically equivalent to Homestuck's act 1, will be updated consistently.

....

Welcome

I see you have found the Skaia System, How would you like us to serve you today?

==> Tell me about this 'Sburb' thing

Oh yes Sburb, what a wonderful little game we've made here, what would you like to do with it, are you a player?

==> I guess I am

Oh that's great, and here are the two sessions you'll be involved with heavily.

==> Two sessions?

Yes indeed, on two different planets no less!

==> Could I see these two planets?

Certainly! Here they are: Earth or ????

==> Click ????

Sorry but you can't do that, the planet is locked to your viewing access currently.

==> Locked? What do you mean?

What else could I mean? This is a game, viewing that planet is an unlockable feature you don't have.

==> Well when you put it that way you are correct.

(Ugh, I think, typing like his is rather strenuous, who knows how long until you give out and use the quirk)

Indeed my child, would you like to start the game by viewing the planet Earth?

(Yes, here we go, reviewing all of this again. Having to relieve what happened here)

 **== > Game Start **(Play Piano Refrain: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5ggzIxfGDs)

The camera is currently on a whole solar system with many planets and asteroids swarming it's orbit. We move up to the first planet, watching it float in it's space. A perfect looking blue-green orb. Not deserving of the destruction it shall be handed as soon as those four play the game.

The United States of America is focused upon, camera zooming quickly to it's southwestern portion. And we view a two-story house with a blonde boy wearing glasses looking out of it. He's fanning himself and holding a miniature electric fan. He looks miserable.

Place: Flagstaff, Arizona

We zoom out from there and head up north east. All the way to the border of Canada, a small town is being rained on. A black haired boy in a scarf stares out at the rain, it was supposed to be rather nice this time in the afternoon, but something blew in off the Atlantic.

Place: Van Buren, Maine

We zoom all the past to the other side of the globe, it is nighttime in this part of the planet. A blonde girl stays in her apartment, keeping the neighbors up with constant games of Dace Dance Revolution. She stays in the Land of the Rising Sun and doesn't sleep until it fulfills it's title.

Place: Yokohama, Japan

Then we go south to another archipelago, known as the Philippines. Where a tough looking dark-haired girl is pumping iron (all the irons not in the fire, so lame, states somebody you've had a lot of time to speak with in the current state of things. And another disagrees with her, they are now in a "am not versus are too" argument, moving on) She puts the weights back on their resting spot and checks the time on her phone, deciding she needs rest.

Place: Naga, The Philippines

We then move back to Flagstaff, where the boy from earlier is laying sprawled on his floor with the window open due to the sweltering heat wave. (Not very flattering of an introduction, not to mention on the poor kids birthday even, I pity him a little bit, just a little)

==> Enter name

A text box appears at this prompt, deciding to go with something silly somebody typed in "Nerdlord Sissypants, Esquire"

It responded with 'try again smartass'

==> Enter REAL Name

"Luke Hirsch"

Correct.

==> 

This boy, now hereby going to be referred to as 'you' is named LUKE HIRSCH and you lay in a heap on the ground because you CAN'T STAND THE HEAT TODAY. As previously mentioned it is your BIRTHDAY, and you can't wait until mom comes home with some refreshing ice cream and a whole pie baked specially for you. You just DON'T DO CAKES for birthdays, your pals all say it's due to "Pretentious Hipster-itus". Which is simply ridiculous, that isn't a real disease. You have many various HOBBYS many of which involve the arts: you enjoy OLD FILMS and OBSCURE MUSICAL GROUPS or BANDS as they are sometimes called. As well as your aspiration to be like them. You also enjoy PARANORMAL LORE and dabble in MEDICINE, which explains you knowing more about illness than those other kids. You are known online by a few people as cabaretAlternative and use a hipstery "blood orange" text color. [God, so pretentious] and your typing style can be described as not caring the least bit.

==> Attempt getting off your floor

You try, but you fail miserably.

==> Maybe because you have no arms?

What are you talking about of course you have arms! What kind of idiot would just go around assuming some people don't have arms? While certainly that is the case and not to be ableist but most people still have both arms. You are one of those people Luke.

==> Try once more to pry yourself off the floor

This time has a better result, now because you have more motivation. A pesterchum icon is alight and one of your friends wants to speak to you. You wonder who it is, your bro Finn is all the way on the east coast and the gals are on the other side of the globe. You get a feeling though you know who it is, as she's the usual suspect.

==> Answer her and her pink kawaii text already.

animeicCondition began pestering cabaretAlternative at 12:07 PM

AC: Ohayo Gozaimasu, Luke-kun!

CA: i don't understand how you could be awake at such an hour, don't people from your planet go to bed?

AC: :3 Well that's just the thing I know's it's your birthday and such so I got all of us a little friendship gift!

CA: that Sburb game right?

CA: the one that we all are waiting for, and your imaginary friends told you will alter our whole world?

AC: Silly silly... the trolls aren't imaginary!

CA: are too

AC: Are not!

CA: listen, i know aliens are totally for real no matter what but why would they come to tell solely you about things?

AC: Hmm, okay stubborn, but I bet you they'll tell you too. About in a minute as a matter of a fact

CA: hold on i think i hear my mother returning home with that ice cream and pie.

cabaretAlternative logged off

==> Look outside your window

Yep, there she is, mom is home.

==> This is stupid

Indeed it is, you would like to forget that that even just happened.

You feel yourself lucky that some alien couldn't possibly have read your thought about that meme, boy wouldn't that be weird?

(Note to self, when I message this kid soon, don't mention that I saw those images)

==> Leave room

But wait what's this? The icon is flashing again!

But what the hell is trollian and who is gallantAmmunition?

\--gallantAmmunition started trolling cabaretAlternative at 12:15 PM--

GA: Human I realize that you are going to make an attempt at that game, I varn you to not.

CA: who the hell are you?

GA: Listen, I'm not wery important at all but the message I bear is incredibly so. I don't knov vhat you humans call this game but don't play it if you want your planet to continue existing in it's current, albeit pitiable, state.

GA: It is a mere suggestion that you don't play this game.

CA: sburb? Man I don't much care as long as we win.

GA: Vell I could not get to you to stop, as youre a vorse sociopath than ewen myself.

CA: seriously what are you though, those "trolls" thea always tells me about?

GA: Yes, in fact I am sort of the Prince of these trolls.

CA: thea I know this is you just stop.

GA: Pssh, like I'm that measly earth human veeaboo, youll knov hov real I am soon enough,

-gallantAmmunition ceased trolling cabaratAlternative-

==> Go dovnstairs

You mean DOWNstairs, with a w right?

==> Exactly, now move along.

Well now that thing was odd, time to get that delicious grindage (which means food)

==>

You enter the hallway an look about it, it is decorated as is usual for you mother with her strange fascination with really photogenic baseball players, it got her kicked out of Chase Field and barred from ever returning, preventing you from ever seeing a D-backs game.

You have learned to not question it by this point because she's learned to put up with your interests so this is sort of a two way street, like nuclear disarmament is.

==> Go into living room

You are now in the living room, a much more presentably wing of the home, seeing as it is always kept in order and has no evidence of anything disconcerting whatsoever, it makes your life seem normal.

==> What is that noise in the kitchen?

You already know what that noise is, it's your mother.

Seriously you have the memory of a goldfish or something.

==> Speaking of Goldfish...

Yes, here on the table by the door, your pet Goldfish, Goldeen Goldstein the 24th

==> The 24th?

Let's just say you go through a LOT of Goldfish. So many goldfish that you hardly know if 24 is even the right number. 24 is the most conservative estimate you can claim to be able to make at this point.

==> Move on from that fish to the TV

Oh boy, the most exciting and depressing drama is on currently

it's called "The News" currently the channel of the news it's on is FOX, the local kind not FOX News that you sometimes tune in to ironically but it only ends up hurting because of Sean Hannity's dumb haircut.

==> Ignore the local news and get that pie already

Yes, the moment you have been waiting for, you enter the kitchen and spot the delicious pie on the counter.

Your pie is home, it is time to get that served the fuck up on a plate and begin consumption.

...Oh god she's coming in to affectionately smooch your forehead, quick evade evade!

==> Activate Strife

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjcgUtra5Xc)

Mom used hugs!

> Parry

You've blocked her once, it only seems to have made her more persistent.

She's coming in again!

> Dodge!

Narrowly avoided the worst fate of all for your kind, actual human contact.

> Strife!

You cannot do it, you cannot strife against your own mother, you give up and retreat with the pie and game to your room, lock the door and shed a (not manly at all) tear.

==> Eat the pie in your room and cry.

No, you refuse to do the crying part

...but as for the pie, yeah you're going to eat it.

==>Consume pie

You do so, rather veraciously in fact, this is violent. This is too violent for our eyes, let's move on to the next human until you decide to start up that game.

==> Check in on that girl weeaboo

You are now that girl, what will you do first?

==> Enter name

Blondie Neverleavesherhouse

excuse me, would you try again, that is definitely NOT her name

==> Retry

Thea Uguisu

Correct!

==>

You are now a girl named THEA UGUISU. And you are living it up in a lofty apartment in the city of YOUR DREAMS, well that's what you say at least. The actual city of your dreams is going to be a place you can go I the game of SBURB. It is a golden wonderland filled with cute pointy people. You are constantly contacted by a group of entities that call themselves "trolls", and most of the time you laugh because of their ANTICS, you believe them to be REALLY CUTE PRANKSTERS FOM SPACE, you have a thing for SPACE, CATCHY JPOP and SYNTHESIZED music, and your hobbies are DANCING, and VIDEOGAMING. Also you people would suspect you of being really SCIZOPHRENIC if they heard about the trolls and 'narrator' you sometimes go on about. Your chumhandle is animeicCondition and you type in absolutely KAWAII PINK. Most of the time you type regularly, but when infused with enough soda you CAN be reeeeeally SUUUPER Hyper!!!

==> Stay up all night.

Oh ho ho, looks like you've already accomplished that much.

==> Dance! Dance! Revolution!

You play some DDR and cause a tremendous ruckus, it is very upsetting to your neighbors, girl where are your parent to discipline you?

==> Thea: Be an orphan?

"Orphan? Oh right no parents, that doesn't mean they are dead silly narrator!"

You just sort of was dropped off here and left alone, Dad sometimes comes back you think, most of the time he's out on a business trip. You believe he comes back because he always leaves a present for you.

==> This is... weird... what's that thing back there?

"Back where? Narrator are you okay?"

Yeah... it's just that really unsettling...toy object...doll

==> Look at that terrible thing

"Hey! Calaboose is NOT terrible, he is a beautiful angel of a doll that always helps around the house!"

==> Move on from her because that thing unnerves me.

"Okay, buhbye, hope you return soon friend!"

[How does she know, how can she even hear me n4rr4t1ng? 0h, h3r3 1t g03s 4g41n, my qu1rk 1s b4ck]

==> be the narration troll

A dark room, fingers typing away at a keyboard as he goes about contacting friends and the like but, wasn't he the one narrating? Why yes, but this is actually my past self, long before the events of even Luke and Thea's game. 1 gu3ss 1 w4s r4th3r cut3 b4ck th3n

==> contact past self

N0 g0, th4t just 1s n0t 4 th1ng 1 c4n d0

w3 c4n 0nly w4tch

==> come on, the audience wants some paradoxes

you will unlock timetraveling paradoxes when you've met all the humans

==> Okay, on to that other human Kid then

==> Enter Name  
Vice Chansellor Nerdleroy

(Try again, that's a cocamamie suggestion for a name.)

==>

Finn Twaine

==>

You (Finn) pace(s) about in the rain, awaiting a package

 ==> Get miffed and let off the steam on your phone


	2. Act 1 Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates shall continue to stream into this fanfic every so often, keep an eye out. Commands after Finn's bio are from my thread on MSPARP: http://forums.msparp.com/showthread.php?tid=4326
> 
> Character List (thus far)  
> animeicCondition [AC] Thea  
> Calaboose the Horrifying Doll  
> cabaretAlternative [CA] Luke  
> Mom Hirsch  
> gyroscopicTrapezius [GT] Fran  
> anarchistGoober [AG] Finn  
> Dad Twaine  
> gallantAmmunition [GA] ???  
> The Narrator/Mysterious Troll

You play a game on the phone to distract yourself from the everything.

==> Introduce self

To whom? Nobody is present? And you aren't like Thea with all her crazy talk of Narrators and alien space pranksters or whatever.

==> Come on, do one of those Bio thingies the last two kids had, you know the deal

Alright, right now you are FINN TWAINE and today you are unusually impatient in waiting for the game Sburb, really testing your patience right now is the fact you are currently outside your house at the moment. Due to an ODD HABIT of needing to take mail DIRECTLY FROM THE MAILMAN, or so you say. It's actually just that your DAD is an ALCOHOLIC, and you just got in trouble. Despite the funnyman on the outside, like your best pal Luke you are rather TORMENTED INTERNALLY by quite a few things and could be a bit RADICAL in some people's opinions.

==> Some asshole is pestering you. Check your messages. And don't forget to eat potatoes.

Oh whatever does this asshole want? You are grousing, you are being pestered while an important mail delivery is coming.  
  
Of course it is her, she is so damn overbearing...  
  
Sigh, who is she? What is her name?

==>Insufferable Nag

Halt right there, that is not her name. You are now her.   
  
Your name is Fran Rosario. You have just gotten done with WEIGHTLIFTING and SQUATS while listening to your TRAINING MUSIC (and by that I mean "Stronger Than You" from Steven Universe on loop) and are now the one pestering one Finn Twaine. You bother him on almost a consistent basis, you have all the overbearing qualities of a MOM, a DAD, and an OLDER SISTER, even though the two of you are only one day apart age wise, and he lives across the world from your home in the Philippines. A TOWEL firmly on your shoulders, awaiting him to answer the pestering. Online your handle is gyroscopicTrapezius , because it really conveys that you are all about bodybuilding.

[Pesterlog]

\--gyroscopicTrapezius began pestering anarchistGoober--  
GT: Finn, do you mind if I bother you now? I finished my workout.  
AG: You know that the only work that matters to me is union work.  
GT: Reading Marx again?  
AG: Marx was a commie frannie, i'm an anarchist, but unions are fine because they aren't a form of government, but rather a band of fellowship!  
GT: Sorry that I didn't get your preferred leftist political affiliation of the week correct.  
GT: But please stop derailing this conversation. You always do this.  
AG: Pssh, you know i don't always do it.  
GT: But you're doing it right now.  
AG: Am not.  
GT: You are absolutely stalling Finny-boy. We need to have a talk right now.  
AG: I won't talk to you until you take that back, i will not take this patronizing attitude of yours.  
GT: The game.  
AG: Shit... did i just lose it?  
GT: Lose what?  
AG: I lost the game.  
GT: Oh my flipping gosh may you cease this stalling, I am speaking of Sburb  
AG: Uh yeah, the mail carrier is incoming. you already have a copy?  
AG: Does that make two or three of us now in possession?  
GT: Yes. I have mine. Thea has hers, and I heard Luke has just now received it. Are you ready?  
AG: Most definitely madam.

[/log]

==> play the game?

Finn bows and shakes the mailman's hand, thanking him for his service before rushing into the house, holding the game.  
  
But he is stopped on his way to the computer, the sleeve with the disk in it flying across the front room.  
  
It was Dad, and he was upset!

==> Finn: confront dad. if all fails, go to the bathroom and cry it out.

You stand up to the father figure. It's almost as if a particularly intense strife theme has started up, and when it comes to this game this is only Boss 1, you are going to finally, FINALLY smash the authority he holds.  
  
Dad has a mop and bucket, insisting that you do your chores like a good obedient little boy. He strifes you with the cleaning materials, knocking away some health points.  
  
Kneeling on the ground shaking, you just bum rush the damn drunkard. Placing a headbutt square in his torso, you will not act as this man's slave any longer!  
  
You grab the game and run to your room, a tear trailing down your cheeks.

[Log]

\--cabaretAlternative started a group chat--  
CA: okay, where are you guys?

\--animeicCondition entered chat--  
AC: i'm right here!!!!!!!!!!! :3  
CA: alright, that makes the two of us booting it up.

\--gyroscopicTrapezius entered chat--  
GT: I have in fact informed Madre and Padre about our game, and we can now start.  
CA: ok, three then  
CA: where the fuck is twaine anyways? how long does his dumbass mailman crush take to get there?  
AC: he should be swinging by real soon, after his dad troubles get over with  
CA: did the trolls tell you that? the kid will never get over his pops, it seems to run in that family. my best guess is he finally spilled the beans and is making out with the mailman as i type this.  
GT: That was rather rude Luke.  
CA: hey, i'm not trying to make fun of him, i'm his closest confidant and i know these things.  
AC: *thea whispers to her friends* he is coming in about 3 seconds, he dealt with dad well  
\--anarchistGoober entered the chat--  
CA: well when he shows up-  
CA: holy shit  
AG: I am now present, let's get this over with.  
CA: did you get over dad mr. daddy issues?  
CA: because thea has informed us of something along those lines  
AG: I put the disk in, whos going to be who's server player?

> Luke: Boot up your copy  
(<https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_8Te2KIA-I> begins playing)  
  
Meteors begin there descent onto planet Earth, appearing from out of nowhere. The sky turned a deep red and Mom sat, watching the news when the weather reporter suddenly broke that they were on their way. She didn't know why meteors were coming again but it can't be anything worrisome, last time a meteor struck Arizona...  
  
Meanwhile in the Philippines an elderly couple stares out of their window, and somewhere in Japan, a businessman looks to the skies, and in Maine an alcoholic gets back to his feet covered in soapy water, seething.   
  
DAD: that boy is absolutely grounded!  
...  
_> Be Luke_  
 _ >Be Thea_  
 _ >Be Finn_  
 _ >Be Fran_

>Be Luke?

You are now Luke Hirsch, and you have been voted in as the official leader, and thus are the first one to activate the game, Thea attaches herself to you as her server player. Then Fran got in the loop behind her. Next up Finn joined the game, and you completed the loop around.  
  
So the reach-around loop goes Luke to client--> Thea to client --> Fran to client --> Finn to client --> Luke   
  
You look at the computer screen, and for some reason you see a view of Thea's room. Thea is waving at you, holding one arm around her freakish doll, that thing gives you the heebie-jeebies.

[Pesterlog]

\--animeicCondition began pestering cabaretAlternative--  
AC: hey! can you see me? do i look kawaii?  
CA: what exactly the hell is this game?  
AC: you didn't know this would happen? huh, i thought for sure they'd tell you  
CA: no thea, your stupid troll buddy was not helpful in any way shape or form  
AC: oh! you must have been contacted by GA then.  
CA: yeah i was interrupted by gallantAsshole alright  
AC: :( luke-kun, could you just deploy my stuff already?  
CA: fine, fine. i'm on it.

[/log]

>Which of the items do you put down in Thea's room?

>hmmm... the bathroom sink?

You try figuring out the controls to this thing, maybe it wasn't good to put you in charge of this shit. You have dropped the bathroom sink into her living room... and it goes right through the floor, nearly taking her small apartment down with it.  
  
Thea: Eep! Luuuke! I meant to put down the cruxite machine here! Now my downstairs neighbors are going to be really upset with me!

==> Try putting it back...? Apologize to Thea maybe?

It's no use! The sink has tumbled down about a dozen floors before shattering into pieces on the ground floor. You deploy the Cruxtruder to patch up the hole in the floor, it was big enough to not fall though, but Thea might want to be careful when walking because her floor is not holding up well.  
  
Thea: Ah yes, that is much better! I can just pop out the cruxite dowels here! And my kernalsprite will then be released!  
  
You watch her pull out a pink... object and a glowing, floating ball appeared as well as an ominous looking countdown timer with 12 minutes, 10 seconds.  
  
What now?

==> Get to business: deploy more stuff, like an Alchemiter.

  
You deploy the Alchemiter and a totem lathe into Thea's home, maneuvering them as carefull as possible in the little space that you have to work with in this specific situation. It was tough but the job was done.  
  
She placed an un-lathed dowel onto the alchemiter and made a one (1) perfectly generic object.  
  
You are now being pestered by one of your two other teammates. Which one?

==> Fran.


End file.
